Phrase Writers Group

Gowan's Stories & other writing

LATEST

Here is the latest writing in each section. Some were written years ago; they have been added recently to this page. Enjoy!

Christmas Tree Challenge (14 August 2020)
Buying Christmas presents for people who otherwise will receive nothing

Quiz
Portmanteau (3 March 2025)
Light-hearted quiz to exercise your brain cells

Stories: Fiction
A Man Called Fred (17 July 2025)
Welcome to Gnome Sweet Gnome hotel

Stories: Non-Fiction
Scone Today (19 June 2020)
My recipes were born out of necessity. Too much month and mouth and too little money!

Poetry
The Saddest Tale Ever Told (1975)
Written during my Boy Band years!

Music
Diamonds (1996-1999)
Inspired by a true story

Recipes
Coleslaw (31 January 2021)
Shredded raw cabbage and other vegetables. A colourful mixture of red, white, and orange

Panto Pirates stories:
A Practical Panto Pirate Primer (18 January 2023)
A tale of pantomime pirates and their team building treasure hunt

The Perfect Storm (21 September 2023)
The Panto Pirates first rehearsal

The Structural Engineer’s Secret (5 October 2023)
The Panto Pirates do set design

Oh Yes You Can (14 November 2024)
The Panto Pirates first performance

The saga continues

Stories: Fiction

A Man Called Fred (17 July 2025)
Welcome to Gnome Sweet Gnome hotel

A Distant Star (18 June 2025)
Overnight star needs her friend

At the Dinner Table (5 June 2025)
Old Habits, part 2

Old Habits (15 May 2025)
Kick in when least expected

Oh Yes You Can (14 November 2024)
The Panto Pirates first performance

The Writer's Secret (3 October 2024)
Safe Secrets Society finally meet

Nelson's Story (19 September 2024)
First day as a reporter

William's Legacy (1 July 2024)
Gone but not forgotten

Evidence (13 June 2024)
Badly behaved children but no proof

Found (16 May 2024)
Hidden in clear sight

The Structural Engineer's Secret (5 October 2023)
The Panto Pirates do set design

The Perfect Storm (21 September 2023)
The Panto Pirates first rehearsal

The Librarian's Secret (4 April 2023)
Ways of helping

The Promise (16 March 2023)
Making and breaking a promise

A Practical Panto Pirate Primer (18 January 2023)
All the things perspiring Pantomime Pirates (& Baddies) need to know

A Christmas Crime (15 December 2022)
The biggest Father Christmas mystery solved

Lost (17 November 2022)
Where is Santa's Christmas Cracker Joke Book?

The Quiz Team (3 November 2022)
And the winner is...

The Secret Path (19 October 2022)
Cunning secret to winning a race

Decade (28 April 2022)
Busy job, needing family time

Hair Today (17 March 2022)
Modern story of a classic fairy tale

Feeding The Ducks (2 September 2021)
Two different points of view

Awake With My Friends (24 August 2021)
The party of my life, my first and last as host

Comfort Zone (17 August 2021)
In the Comfort Zone cafe, who would willingly leave?

Lost and Found (11 August 2021)
The shortest short story I’ve written, so far

Locked Up (12 March 2020)
After yet another stretch inside with her friend Cass, Steph has concocted the Perfect Crime. What can possibly go wrong?

Making Do (27 February 2020)
The second Toby & Toni story. Written in one sitting. I did a half marathon in my early 20s. Would have been impossible but for the hospital stays, rectifying my knocked knees

The Angel (13 February 2020)
The first Toby & Toni story. Written in one sitting. Based on my childhood stays in hospital. All character names donated by friends; their characters are my imagination!

The Headline (25 July 2019)
Written in two sittings, lots of planning. Inspired by real life events, singer/songwriter Hattie Briggs being spotted by Alfie Boe when she was busking on the London Underground. Friends donated their (first) names

Party Food (27 June 2019)
My first "Phrase Writers" story. Written in one sitting. A real morale booster, I could still write. Had fun with the character names!

Joseph's Wish (June 2011)
Written for my two (then) young football-mad nephews

The Noisy Ogre (April 2009)
Written for my (then) young niece

Worlds Apart (September 2008)
A Scotsman abroad

Stories: Non-Fiction

Christmas Tree Challenge (14 August 2020)
Buying Christmas presents for people who otherwise will receive nothing

Scone Today (19 June 2020)
My recipes were born out of necessity. Too much month and mouth and too little money!

Getting in a flap (30 May 2020)
Life serfing (sic!) a cat

My Life as a Care Worker (August 2014)
I worked as a homecare worker for 13 months, leaving in May 2014. This article reflects MY experiences

The Secret to a Faster You (19 March 2010)
Published in London's Serpentine Running Club magazine 'Serpentimes'

Stanley's Double Day (October 2008)
On being walked by the dog

Round Norfolk Relay 2004 (June 2004)
Published in London's Serpentine Running Club magazine 'Serpentimes'

Poetry

Toned (1997 / 3 September 2020)
The continuing adventures of Toby & Toni -- sort of

Peace Be With You Always (1997)
Written as a choral piece. Presented here as a poem

Big Bad Nick The Pirate (~1995)
Published by HarperCollins Publishers. Part of "Pirates Activity Cube"

The Aerobic Blues (1985)
On staying fit

From On High (1984)
My Wedding Song, written for a relative

In The Army (1980)
Inspired by Village People's song "In The Navy"

My Special Time (1978)
Written in the days of milkmen and early morning milk deliveries

Showpiece (1978)
One of my early songs

Perspectives In Perspective (1978)
Things may not be what they seem

Baked Beans Blues (1975)
Written in a college library, one sitting, 20 minutes!

The Saddest Tale Ever Told (1975)
Written during my Boy Band years!

Music

The Keys to Success (8 October 2020)
Never underestimate the power of encouragement

Making Music (22 July 2020)
The journey is the reward

You are not alone (2007)
Written for the BBC songwriting competition, Sing London, in 2007. To get people singing at the 2012 Olympics, held in London

Diamonds (1996-1999)
Inspired by a true story

Recipes

• Coleslaw (31 January 2021)
Shredded raw cabbage and other vegetables. A colourful mixture of red, white, and orange

• Black Forest Gateau Scones (3 December 2020)
Cherry, Cream & Chocolate Scones

• Tiger Scones (29 October 2020)
Mandarin orange & Chocolate Scones

• Gowan's Chocolate Fudge (22 September 2020)
AKA Belgian Biscuit Cake, or Uncooked Cake

• Cheese & Olive scones (2 July 2020)
Savoury scones, cheddar cheese, bell pepper, milk

• Gowan's Boiled Cake (26 June 2020)
Egg-free cake. Contains nuts, dairy. Optional alcoholic version

• Cucumber & Bell Pepper scones (23 June 2020)
Savoury scones, cream cheese, turmeric, little or no milk

• Rhubarb & Blueberry scones (19 June 2020)
Sweet scones, sweetened with dates, apple juice and jumbo raisins

Quiz With A Difference

Light-hearted quiz rounds to exercise your brain cells.
Team work with friends and family helps.
Laughter encouraged

• Portmanteau (3 March 2025)

• At The Orifice (24 February 2025)

• V & A (29 December 2024)

• Magic Words (22 December 2024)

• Lit'l Lilt (20 February 2024)

• Trio Rio Io (30 January 2024)

• Zebra Crossing (3 October 2023)

• A Jolly Holiday (5 September 2023)

• 3 of a Kind (27 June 2023)

• Mother Tongues (16 May 2023)

• Pillow Fights (25 April 2023)

• Points (6 November 2022)

• Wearer Be-Wear (16 October 2022)

• Inspector Morse Dashing Around (9 October 2022)

• Sporting Trophies (2 October 2022)

• American English (25 September 2022)

• Phonetic Acronym (18 September 2022)

• Out in Africa (11 September 2022)

• Run Around (4 September 2022)

• Spaced Out (28 August 2022)

• Kids Games (21 August 2022)

• Milk Round (14 August 2022)

• Matters Of State (7 August 2022)

• The Common Touch (31 July 2022)

• Advanced Aptitude Test in Solving Light-Hearted Quizzes (24 July 2022)

• Snap! Crackle! Pop! (17 July 2022)

• Nail Your Colours (26 June 2022)

• Bill, Oscar & Sam (12 June 2022)

• Animal Families (5 June 2022)

• The Full Monty (29 May 2022)

• The Works (15 May 2022)

• Phonetic Acronym (12 December 2021)

• Animal Offspring (21 November 2021)

• Refined Retailer (14 November 2021)

• Trading Places (7 November 2021)

• Apples and Pears (31 October 2021)

• Barking Up (24 October 2021)

• Watching The Detectives (17 October 2021)

• Best Friends Forever (10 October 2021)

• A Clever Re-Organisation Nudges Your Memory (3 October 2021)

• Engineering Puzzles (26 September 2021)

• The Starters Round (19 September 2021)

• You are the weakest... (12 September 2021)

• Gordon Bleu (5 September 2021)

• Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (29 August 2021)

• Mastermind (22 August 2021)

• Cross Porpoises (15 August 2021)

• Terms of endearing wardrobe malfunctions (8 August 2021)

• Multi Joys (1 August 2021)

• The Soaps Round (25 July 2021)

• Weather Tis Nobler (18 July 2021)

• Yoo Hoo (11 July 2021)

• Colour My World (4 July 2021)

• Letters Play (27 June 2021)

• Mind Your Language (20 June 2021)

• ThingUmmyBob (13 June 2021)

• Slipped Out (6 June 2021)

• General Knowledge Major Blank (30 May 2021)

• Food & Drink (23 May 2021)

• Name The Other Half (16 May 2021)

• Fear Not (9 May 2021)

• Collective Nouns (2 May 2021)

About Gowan

In March 2019 I went to "Wannabe a Writer Lunch", hosted by author & Writing Magazine columnist Jane Wenham-Jones.

I had bought her brilliant book Wannabe a Writer? in 2008. Later bought the follow up Wannabe A Writer We've Heard Of?.

Also found The Maeve Binchy Writers' Club and Stephen King's On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft useful.

Wanted to kickstart my writing after a ten year break. Jane suggested I join a writing group.

In April I went along to Phrase Writers in Hillingdon, West London. They meet every two weeks with a summer break. Members read out their work and the group make constructive comments & provide encouragement.

At every Phrase Writers meeting we are given (optional) homework, a subject or phrase to inspire a story or poem.

For several meetings I read pieces I'd written before; stories, articles, song lyrics. Finally in June I wrote a short story, "Party Food" and I was off!

In September 2022 I joined Hillingdon U3A (University of the Third Age), specifically for the Ukulele group. In 2023 joined the Creative Writing group.

Early 2024, wanting to try something different, I joined the Science and Technology group. Every meeting one of its members would deliver a talk, 1 hour or 90 minutes, with a refreshment break plus Questions. I have written several talks on subjects within my comfort zone (computers) and how I make radio shows. Working on Code breaking talk. All about code breaking from early times up to how Enigma was cracked at Bletchley Park.

© Gowan Clews 1978-2025